Bram Stoker's Dracula. Odd name for a game really - Dracula would have sufficed. I mean, it's not as if there's Mary Shelley's Dracula knocking around. Anyway, the Count has borrowed your fiancée, probably intending to commit bloody deeds at some point and your task, surprisingly enough, is to rescue her. And knock Dracula out for the count.
The vampire has many friends including henchmen and small, evil animals which suck the very lifeblood out of you. But worst of all, there's the Brids of Dracula. Gulp!
Set over nine stages, Bram's golden egg combines platform action with elements of the beat-em-up genre. The hero (that's you - if you buy the game) is called Jonathan and he's blessed with the sweetest two feet since Eric Cantona, a punch straighter than Lennox Lewis and a wardrobe nattier than George Armani's. Scattered around the dank castle halls are coffins to kick, cross to brandish and bottles of blood to sup.
Dracula basically involves a lot of wandering around, kicking small animals and dead folk in such exotic locations as taverns, convents, castles and asylums. Graphically, it looks OK but unfortunately it all gets rather dreary after a while.
"Dracula, you can keep my fiancée. I can't really be bothered".