YOU aren't often given the opportunity to play "the other side" in games with a Middle East flavour, but in Speedboat Assassin you, too, can be that fervent Iranian revolutionary.
Yes indeed, capitalist pigs around the world require killing as they revel in their decadent harbours, protected by the warships and mines of Satan himself.
I, revolutionary brother Mohammed Evans, have been charged to destroy the imperialist forces of evil and fight to my last breath for the Islamic Revolution. My gunship has dropped me into the harbour of New York, home of the unholiest pigs of all. I weel destroy them.
Hayeee! But what is this? Those sons of Satan have laid mines across the entrance to the harbour. With God on my side, surely I can navigate my way through the winding channel, deadly mines hovering on either side.
BOOOOMMMM! Urk...
Cough splutter. Quick, Ishmael, speedboat number two.
Ha! It seems I must go at the pace of a snail to avoid their deadly clutches. And here I am in the open and ready to teach the Yankee pigs a lesson. But what is this? Ishmael, you fool! There are no weapons on this speedboat!
Quickly, bring the helicopter and drop them down to me.
Fab, with all this delay the Americans have spotted me and are sending their own speedboats and warship to intercept me. But I, Mohammed Evans, is more than their equal to the task. Take tha...
BOOOOMMMM! Urk...
Cough splutter. Those accursed Yankees are as treacherous as sin. Ishmael, the third speedboat.
Yaaeeyy! This is more like it. All four towers destroyed and now I escape to bring further glory to the revolution.
But what is this approaching? God protect your servant Mohammed, a fat Yankee battleship is blocking the exit! All its guns is firing. Oh no, and there were another three capitalist harbours to destroy as well...
BOOOOMMMM! Urk...
Cough splutter. Ishmael, kindly be telephoning Virgin Mastertronic that its simulation of revolutionary revenge is far too hard. The detection of the sprites also sucks like a camel.