Blimey. What a dodgy concept, eh? A game where you have to throw petrol bombs through the window of MacDonalds to win. Very ideologically unsound. Still, that's what you must have to do, or else why would they call the game Diner Blaster? What? Oh, it's Dyna Blaster. So no MacDonalds then? No petrol bombs? Thank goodness for that. Mind you, it still involves a rather unhealthy obsession with exploding devices. And killing your friends. But, they, it's all for entertainment.
The basic concept behind Dyna Blaster is a simple one. You've got to run around a maze, blowing your way through walls and trying to kill the other players. Also out for your blood are some squishy alien things who stop you from just hiding in a corner until it's all over. Along the way you can collect power-ups to give you more bombs and bigger explosions, and even mystery bonuses that can either help or hinder you, depending on how lucky you are. Like I said simply bloody good fun.
Now if you're the sort of person who has no friends at all, Dyna Blaster may not be quite as appealing. You see, for the best effect, you really need as many players as possible. The game comes with a special dongle that plugs into your serial port. As well as acting as a copy protection, it allows an extra two joysticks to be plugged in. Add another player on the keyboard and you've got five player mayhem. On your own though, you have to play the computer and it's just not the same. Serves you right for being unpopular. Ha ha ha ha. Ahem.
Before getting into all the wanton violence and exploding people, you must define the terms of victory. For instance, if you want a quick game then the first player to win a round is the overall champion. If you want a more prolonged contest then the first one to score five victories is the overall champ.
So, with that relatively easy choice out of the way it's into the game proper. And blimey, it's a corker. Dyna Blaster is just one of those games that grabs you by the trousers and forces you to play it over and over again. Friendships are shattered into pieces as previously civilised human beings wrench their joysticks into unnatural shapes and howl obscenities at each other. Some will choose to keep themselves to themselves and try and stay alive that way, others will charge around the screen dropping bombs everywhere and generally scaring the more timid players.
In short, it's an incredibly involving game. I'd even go as far to say that this is the sort of game that you could suggest playing at a party and not get beaten up by your mates.
"Hey everyone, let's play on my computer!"
"Shut up you boring get. Nobody plays on computers at parties."
"But I've got Dyna Blaster!"
"Oh right. Me first."
"Sod off, that's the best joystick!"
"How come I always end up using the keyboard?"
"Aaaargh, you got me."
"Get the one in red. He's got the biggest explosions."
"Why isn't my joystick working?"
And so on. It really is a communal sort of game. Just don't play it with anyone who's bigger than you, or you'll probably get beaten up quite a lot.
The graphics are smooth and quite cartoony, with your little bomber men looking for all the world like Lego men in space helmets. The sound consists of a bouncy tune and - absolutely essential in this game - beefy explosions. In the end though, it's playability that counts, and Dyna Blaster has got so much playability it's got huge crates of the stuff filling up giant warehouses. If playability was loaves of bread, then Dyna Blaster would have been Warburtons.
Bribe them, beg them, sell them to your family but somehow get your mates round with some joysticks and revel in the sheer gorgeousness that is Dyna Blaster.