In this game you get to play the little bear in his quest to explore a large house. Soo the panda, his main squeeze, accompanies him as he deals with all manner of possessed domestic items. The graphics have a curious sepia-tinted look to them, which contrasts with the cartoon-feel of most children's games. But this doesn't detract from the game. There is an easy mode and a hard mode, but the game is eminently playable on either, especially if you're hard.

The only criticism is that the sprites may be a bit small for a kids' game. Bold colours and massive objects are usually the order of the day. Still, not a bad game, and one with lots of detail on each screen.

Sooty and Sweep, eh? Not exactly the hottest licence of the year, but certainly one with a bit of potential. Let's think. How about some sort of 'magic' game, where Sooty's got to use his wand to make different spells to do something or other?

Or a Head Over Heels type thing, where Sooty and Sweep each have different abilities and need to co-operate to save Soo from some deadly peril.

Okay, they're rubbish ideas, but I'm sure anyone with a few hours and a couple of brain cells to rub together could think of some vaguely original way of turning Sooty and Sweep into a fun, happy-go-lucky and sweet computer game.

So what have Alternative managed to come up with? (Wait for it.)

A walk-around-collecting-things game. (FX: Blood-curdling scream, followed by sound of disk being repeatedly savaged with a pair of scissors and finally a toilet flushing).

If I see just... excuse me a minute. (FX: Toilet flushing again.)

Right, it's gone now. As I was saying, if I see just one more of these... these... things, I'm moving to Finland. Sorry, but I am.